One thing that is not lacking just about everywhere is opinion. Everyone has an opinion about everything. There are opinions about having opinions. As a person in a town of a state in a country on this planet, we have quite a bit going on. This leads to many, many opinions. I have noticed in the sharing of all our opinions, what we really want is people to validate “our” opinion. The more agreement, the more likes, the more righteous anger we have on our side, “we” must be right. This means “they” are wrong and “they” will not be right, like us, unless we tell them. I am so very guilty of this type of thinking, but I am trying to change. Since you did not ask… let me tell you why.
I honestly believe there are some acts, words, even ideas that are not up for debate and do not need to be collectively agreed upon to be right. Fundamental compassion and decency are not up for debate. I have come to the point that if these are things that I have to attempt to explain, I simply will not interact with those people that hold the differing viewpoint. After years of attempting to explain, show, reason with, or change the minds of people that are so different, I just became angry. All of the time. Angry and disheartened about the world around me and the people in it. I saw negativity everywhere and I began to wear the weight of the negativity like an invisible coat. The weight became heavy, too heavy. Since you did not ask… let me tell you what I’m doing to change.
To overcome the overwhelming cloud of gloom and despair, I began reading articles, blogs, books, and anything else I could find to figure out how to still care about, pretty much anything, without getting sucked into the apoplectic void. Through the course of this journey of enlightenment I found research that stated quite clearly social media is the devil. Most people have come to this conclusion on their own. But how do you maneuver this minefield if you want to interact with others about current events? The answer is I have no idea. Advice from some resources say do not engage. Others point out that they only control you have is over your content and your reaction. Since you did not ask… Let me tell you my plan.
My husband has called me Pollyanna for years. I achieved this cheerful nomer for (almost) always pointing out the positive of any not so great situation. However, over the past few years Pollyanna turned into Annabelle. For those not familiar, Annabelle is an evil, possessed doll in a horror film. I do not like being Annabelle. In attempting more positivity there is a term that I am still grappling with, and that is “Toxic Positivity.” I think it means not to dismiss people’s concern and fears by shooting rainbows up their nethers. By doing this, you are not addressing their fears and concerns and that makes the issue worse. I honestly know I fail at this and it is not intentional. My sanity requires finding the positive. Since you did not ask… let me tell you how I find the positive.
Positive can be hard to find. Currently, a GPS may be needed to locate the positive. Some people are better at ignoring the negative. Some may not even realize the negative. For me personally, I feel negativity in every aspect of my being and have to actively work to keep it from being all I see. I have to work to locate my positivity. Currently, my positive is found by creativity and highlighting positive actions I see in others. Creativity outlets for me are sewing and photography. Positive actions I see and find inspiring are people doing the best they can to find a way through our pandemic safely. Since you did not ask… let me tell you a positive I experienced recently.
The novel virus, SARS-CoV-2, or covid, has recently invaded our lives. Everything has changed. Decisions and risk levels are having to be made about the most routine of tasks on a daily basis. No matter what decision is made, there will be some anger. Too much or not enough is basically the attitude on any virus mitigating directive. None has been as hotly debated as the opening of schools and the allowing of sports…specifically high school football. The positive that has given me the most hope in a while is seeing almost complete compliance of health directives. Compliance from students, teachers, coaches, parents, players, band, cheerleading… I am not going to pretend I did not see nostrils and masks around chins on some. But to see players come of the field, and put on a mask after removing their helmet… to see the band take the field with mask on their person and their instruments… to see cheerleaders in mask on the sidelines cheering… it gave me hope that these kids will set an example for the stubborn to follow. These acts make it very evident these kids will do what is asked to be able to continue. Those who do not comply are putting all of that at risk. The positive is our kids are willing. We have to follow the example.
Thank you for listening… Since you did not ask.
